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| From Slane Augusta McCue - Week 2 |
Fortunately for us, Slane sleeps like...well, she sleeps like her mom. A lot. Slane has been getting 4-6 hours most nights, making us the envy of our friends with newborns. We are grateful that Slane sleeps. However, my productivity has tanked. This is a combination of choice, opportunity, and necessity. My employer has a generous six week paternity leave. The weeks leading up to my leave I worked like I was going to be gone for six weeks. Other than occasionally checking email and answering a few phone calls, I have unplugged from work. In the current economy, I recognize that this is a privilege. As a contract employee with two local schools and a private music instructor, MamaCue has not had the same luxury. This week, she has returned to her full schedule - three mornings in the classroom and most of her 15 private lessons.
Here's the funny thing: I'm doing exactly what I thought I would do during my paternity leave. I am home, taking care of my firstborn and bonding with her. And yet I don't feel like I'm doing enough because when I go to bed there are dirty dishes in the sink, dirty clothes in the hamper, clean clothes in the dryer, bills to be paid, emails to be read and answered...you get the idea. I'm learning that even when I'm doing exactly what I envisioned doing, it doesn't feel like it's enough. This reorientation of priorities and routine has been the biggest adjustment of all, one that will be even more profound when I return to work in May.
[h/t to Teresa, Penelope, and Ariel for writing posts that provided food for these thoughts.]
1 comment:
WELCOME TO MY WORLD! Seriously, leaving full time work has done nothing for the cleanliness and organizational state of my house. It took me a while to realize you can't beat yourself up over those things. And when I tired to keep on top all things domestic and do everything else being mostly at home affords me the opportunity to do...I was a cranky, tired bitch.
When you go to work out of the house there's the luxury of having a defined start and stop to your day. When your job is maintaining the house you are always at work and always on and if you don't allow yourself to just be off, you'll miss all the other really great things being home with Slane for these few weeks has to offer. Enjoy it. Dishes will eventually get done and as long as no body has to go naked yet I'm sure the laundry can wait a day or two. Snuggles and play however can't wait :)
We were fortunate to have good sleepers from the git go too. Makes you feel a little guilty as a new parent when people ask about how tired you feel and you aren't...but hey, I'm not going to feel sore that I didn't get to experience extreme sleep deprivation in addition to all the other excitement of having a new born!
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